- How do you gauge the most important quality of a car? (Hint: if you didn’t answer “c”, stop right here.)
a) By how well it approximates the gas mileage of a vintage 1990 Geo Metro.
b) By how many cows and beer cases it can haul.
c) By how well it drives, corners, and accelerates.
d) By how many brick walls it can plow into while keeping the roof structure intact.
e) By how many have been sold and whether my neighbors, relatives, and “Mary Joe” has one.
- What is your preferred type of transmission?
a) An automatic.
b) A manual (aka. “stick” or “standard”)
c) Grandpa’s “Three on the tree” column shifter.
d) I don’t know what a “transmission” is.
- When driving a stick, do you double clutch when downshifting?
b) Heck, no, like I know what double clutching is!
c) I’ll have to get back to you on that.
- Do you use the heel-toe downshifting technique whenapproaching or blasting through a corner?
c) I don’t dance while driving.
- Where are the drivewheels located in a real sports car?
a) Must be the front, cuz Mitsubishi keeps touting the front-wheel-drive Eclipseas the “best-selling import sports car!”
b) You mean “steering wheel,” right?
c) The rear.
- Which of the following is the best 0-60mph acceleration time?
a) 4.5 seconds, a la Lotus Esprit.
b) 7.8 seconds, because the Toyota Camry can accelerate to 60in this time and it’s the best-selling car in America!
c) 15 seconds, because that is the “safest.”
c) 30 seconds, a la early 50’s Bug, because more is better!
- How many other people do you plan to carry in your sports car at once?
a) My softball team
b) A gang of 5
c) Just one, prefferably my favorite guy or gal.
- What’s your attitude towards the weight of your car?
a) Heavier is better because it’s “safer”.
b) Heavier is better because Dad was bragging theother day that his Cadillac weighs over 4000 pounds!
c) Less is more, as in more acceleration and braking potential!
- What’s your attitude towards a car’s seating position?
a) I don’t mind if I feel like I’m sitting on the flooras long as the lower seating position allows for better aerodynamics and handling.
b) I must sit high, like in a bus, so I can see overeverything!
c) I like the seating position in my Toyota Camry.
- Which of these is a true modern-day sports car?
a) Mitsubishi Eclipse.
b) Ford Mustang, especially the V6 version becauseit’s good on gas!
c) Porsche 911.
d) Chevy Nova.
Best answers: 1.) c 2.) b 3.) a 4.) a 5.) c 6.) a 7.) c 8.) c 9.) a 10.) c