Regular readers of this website may have noticed that I’ve been waxing poetically (and incessantly) about the wondrous city of Fort Collins, Colorado for a few months now.
So a slight change in subject is in order. How about: what do you call the people of Fort Collins?
“Really friendly,” “ultra-fit,” and “good drivers” are all valid responses. They are not, however, the answers I am looking for. What I mean is, how should one refer to us?
Greg Campbell, the editor of the Fort Collins Weekly openly wondered about this important topic in a recent article. He pointed out that the citizens of Colorado are called Coloradoans; the residents of Boulder are dubbed Boulderites; and those of Denver are referred to as Denverans. (Never mind that I have not heard anyone else use either of the last two terms yet.) Whereas the proud residents of Fort Collins are nameless.
Ah, such are the great problems of this town.
Never fear, the “residents of Fort Collins” themselves are here with suggestions! Here is a sampling of a few of them:
The more standard responses included Fort Colliners, Fort Collinders, Fort Collinists, or—for the grammarians among us—Fort Colonists.
Along the same lines was the suggestion of Fort Colanders, although that reminds me too much of washing green leafy vegetables or draining spaghetti. Those are two foods, by the way, that are favored by some of the many elite athletes in Fort Collins.
Then there were allusions to the different pseudonyms of the town. “The Choice City” inspired suggestions of The Choosers and The Chosen, but admittedly, the latter sounds a bit presumptuous and may prompt boycotts, picketing and death threats by God-fearing religious fundamentalists all over the world.
In reference to Fort Collins’ location just east of the Rockies, one could also come up with the Front Rangers or Front Range Commanders (Greg Campbell’s personal favorite). One I also got a laugh out of was FCers, which according to the nominator means “From California, like every third person I meet.”
Other nominations—which are certainly in the running for the dorkiest names ever—included The Children of the Corn, Fort-Hemians, and Fort Collinsoscopy. Don’t ask.
Of course, I am an expert in dorkiness. Therefore, may I suggest Fort Funners (in reference to the commonly used nickname of Fort Fun) and Fort Colon Cleansers.
Hmmm, the “really friendly, ultra-fit, good-driving residents of Fort Collins” tagline is sounding better and better all the time.
Postscript (March 2006)
Okay, so it’s been generally agreed upon that Bob Komives’ suggestion of “Fort Collinser” is the best especially since it retains the whole name of our city! So go ahead and call us Fort Collinsers!